You Ain't Woman Enough To Take My Man

Willard has a new woman in his life.  He is AMAZED by everything she does for him.  Her name is Siri.  Ever since he got his new iPhone 5, he’s been madly in love with her. 

“Siri is soooo cool”

“Siri calls anybody I tell her to”

“Siri can text!”

Nice, honey.  Real nice.

 

Blah. Blah.  Big deal.  Can she make cornbread like I do?  Huh, can she?  Does SHE tolerate the most annoying dog in the world just because you have some weird attachment to it?  Did she carry and birth your children? Has she suffered through the movie “Empire Records” at least 47 times with you?  (I know not many of you recognize that movie title.  Don't bother to google it.  Trust me, it's not worth it.)

Well, I’ve got a message for Siri. I believe Loretta Lynn said it best… You ain’t woman enough to take my man.  For real.