Wash Me!

We’re leaving for the beach in a couple of days and I have a problem. I really want to get my car cleaned up, but it’s a bigger job than I can handle. I’m pretty sure it’s a bigger job than anybody except Jesus can handle.

My poor Tahoe is a 2008 and it has 111,000 miles. I would guess that someone was eating McDonald’s or drinking Gatorade throughout at least 100,500 miles of it. When people say “I don’t allow my kids to eat in the car”, I’m amazed. So you don’t feed your kids? Between all our ballgames, it’s not humanly possible for us not to eat in the car. We would be perfect candidates if TLC ever decides to do a special car edition of “Hoarders”.

Close your eyes and imagine a concoction of red dirt, sweat, apple juice, all colors of Gatorade, French fries, chips, sunflower seeds and gummy worms all mixed and melted together. Now imagine it ground into the carpet. Now, take the picture in your head and realize that YOU’RE NOT EVEN CLOSE to how nasty and disgusting it is. And the smell… I don’t even want to go there. I carried two extra kids to bible school last month and one of them held his nose all the way there and back every day. So embarrassing. I bought some pretty good stuff at Wal-Mart (shhh…don’t tell my son I started shopping at Wal-Mart again) but it’s $10 for a bottle and I was only able to clean a little tiny square. By my calculations, I would have to spend approximately $580 dollars to do the entire car.

I wish there was a way I could anonymously drop my car off to someone who professionally details. They could clean it and then just park it somewhere with the keys in it and I could pick it up WAY after dark so nobody would see me. Ugh. I don’t know what to do. Any suggestions???