Keeping It Real ...

One night last week I asked Gigi to sweep the kitchen floor while I cleaned up supper dishes.  She’s sweeping right along… sweep, sweep, sweep…when she suddenly stops. 

“Mommy! Is that brownie or poop in the floor?”

Do you think I said –

(a)    “I’m sure it’s brownie.  Unless it’s poop.  Either way, it’s got to be cleaned up.”

(b)   “Let me see… sniff…It’s brownie.  Now sweep.”

(c)    “Oh my goodness!! There’s no way there’s POOP in my kitchen floor.  How could you even think such a thing??”

Hint: The answer is not “c”. 

Keeping it real, folks.  Just keeping it real. 

 

Behind the scenes... Block Party 2014

The 15^th Annual Community Block Party at Danville Baptist Church is tomorrow night.  It’s absolutely the most exhausting and most exhilarating weekend of the year for me. 

The basis of the party is GRACE, so everything is free.  Everything.  Hamburgers, hotdogs, snow cones, funnel cakes, cotton candy, popcorn, drinks… all free.  School supplies… free.  A gymnasium cram packed full of every imaginable yard sale item you can think of, enough clothes to clothe a village, furniture… totally free.  Live music, great door prizes, games for kids, fireworks… Yep, free.  All you have to do is show up.  

So, there you go.  You’re invited!  It’s fun and you don’t want to miss it!

Now I want to talk about what goes on behind the scenes. 

This is the single biggest mission/ministry project our church does.  It’s huge and it’s a lot of work.  The sheer size of it sets it apart from anything else we do, but what makes it special for me is what I see happening WITHIN the church during this weekend. 

We are a typical church.  We don’t all get along all the time.  Heck, some of us don’t get along ANY of the time.  If our pastor hasn’t rubbed you the wrong way at least once, then you haven’t been here very long (Hi, Bro. Jack).  We disagree about what kind of services to have…. traditional or contemporary.  We can’t all agree on music… some people think it’s too loud and some think the louder the better.  We can’t agree on Sunday night service… some people love the idea of small groups in home settings and some people think if you’re not physically sitting on a pew, then it’s not church.  You get the picture.  We’re all different and no matter how hard Bro. Jack and the rest of the staff try to please everybody, it simply cannot be done. 

But then Block Party week arrives and something magical happens.  Everybody forgets what they were mad about. It’s like all the excuses and pettiness fall away and everybody just shows up to work.  All the cliques disappear and you find 22-year-olds working side by side with 72-year-olds. There will be 200+ church members decked out in red t-shirts working together to show GRACE to our neighbors.  It is a beautiful, beautiful thing.  I know Block Party is about taking a day to love on others, but without even realizing it, we are loving on each other too. 

Jesus loves the Block Party, and so do I!



Happy Anniversary To Us!!

24 years ago today, I woke up on my mom and dad’s couch.  Now that I think about it, that’s odd because I woke up on a couch today too… the only difference is that 24 years ago it was because we had already moved my furniture out to my new house, and today it was because my 2-year-old is rotten.  But that’s another blog. 

I remember playing in the yard with Reggie (my beloved golden retriever) and feeling so guilty that I was leaving him for a week to go on my honeymoon.  Ha….funny how things change.  Now I leave my kids for a week, and I’m like… SEE YA…MAMA NEEDS A BREAK!  But, that too, is another blog. 

The purpose of THIS blog is to celebrate 24 years of marriage with this hottie…

He's handsome... I don't care who you are!

 

First of all, can I just say… we were babies and I can’t believe our parents let us get married!!!   Even if I had been able to look into a crystal ball and see my future, I wouldn’t have believed it.  There are a few things in my life that I would change, but walking down the aisle on July 21, 1990, isn’t one of them.  There have been more happy times than sad times, more blessings than tragedies, and NOT ONE SINGLE episode of domestic violence.  BAM. 

We don’t live a perfect life (he’s grumpy and I tend to miss my hormone pills),  but we live a good life with lots and lots of laughter.  Is he my soul mate? Ummm… maybe… he has potential.  I wish he would take me to more NASCAR races, and he wishes stuff that I can’t post in my blog (oops… sorry, kids) but we are a pretty darn good team at controlling the chaos on New Cut Road. 

Happy 24^th Anniversary to us!

 

Amy + Willard



10 Ways I Annoy My Teen Daughters....

10 Ways I Annoy My Teen Daughters – (not necessarily in order of level of annoyance)

 

1.      I don’t clear the microwave.  When I cook something, I open the door before it beeps (so I don’t have to hear it beep), and then I forget to clear it.  When my family tries to see what time it is, they see :01…

2.      I say “Yolo” … They think I do it just to get on their nerves, but I really like the way it sounds.   

3.      I wear my pants pulled up to my belly button.  Maybe it’s an 80s thing or maybe I’m trying to keep the muffin top inside the muffin pan.  Either way, I catch flack.

4.      My jeans are saggy in the butt.  This is a big one for Karlie.  She hates for my jeans to be saggy, but she doesn’t understand how uncomfortable tight jeans are.  I’d rather be a saggy bottom girl than have to surgically remove my underwear from my crack.

5.      My car is gross… This is more than an annoyance, it’s an embarrassment. Disgusting doesn’t even come close to describing the condition of it.  If you’re trying to picture it in your mind, just give up.  You can’t even imagine.

6.      My laugh can be annoying.  When I get really tickled, my laugh resembles that of an asthmatic hyena.  It is annoying, I’ll admit it.  And Karlie shouldn’t be too annoyed, because she laughs just like me.

7.      I have a Twitter.  Haley Rae complains about me tweeting all the time.  She gets mad when her friends follow me or retweet something of mine.  Jealous much?

8.      I’m bad to ask my kids to rate things.  If Haley is on a date with someone new, I’ll text her and say, “On a scale of 1-10, how cute is he?”.  Or after a week of dating, "On a scale of 1-10, how much do you like him?” They get really annoyed.  I don’t understand it. 

9.      Yuri and Gigi know all the words to Lee Greenwood songs.  Karlie rode to Athens with us yesterday and she was totally freaked out that they sing along with Lee Greenwood’s Greatest Hits CD.  She kept saying, “That’s just not NORMAL, Mom…”

10.  I stretch the truth about how long I’ll be gone to the grocery store.  I mean, if I need them to watch the little girls and I say, “I’ve got to go to the grocery store, the pharmacy, the post office, the library, and get my nails done…”, they’d NEVER agree to keep them. I always say, “Hey, I gotta run pick up a couple of things at Kroger.  I’ll be RIGHT back”… Suckers. 

 

 

Bloodshed on Friday Night

Last Friday night, we took the little kids out to eat.  When we got home and the interior light in the car came on, I suddenly heard Yuri and Gigi screaming… “Ahhhh! Blood!!!”  I looked back and saw BLOOD all over Aubree’s face, hands, and clothes.

What followed was several seconds (felt like several MINUTES!) of total chaos, with Gigi yelling, “The vampires got Aubree!”

We quickly discovered that it was a simple nosebleed that caused all the drama, but Aubree was milking it for all it was worth, and had to be carried inside by Yuri.  I guess the blood loss left her too weak to walk?

As I was cleaning Aubree up, Gigi walks in and says, “Well, the good news is that if Aubree doesn’t make it, at least I’ll be the youngest again”.

That’s my girl – her glass is always half full!

P.S. Aubree made it.

 

Paper or Plastic?

We use a lot of dishes in this house.  As soon as I load the dishwasher, somebody comes through and messes up another plate or glass or fork.  With the kids being home now for summer, I decided to stock up on paper plates and plastic utensils.  This morning, Gigi asked for cereal so I fixed her some Fruit Loops in a Styrofoam bowl and stuck in a plastic spoon.  Well, she was outraged. 

“I am NOT eating out of a FAKE bowl.  I’m only eating out of real dishes”. 

Here’s the “BEFORE” picture of Gigi…

 

Stay tuned for her “AFTER” picture in August…she’s going to be real skinny. 

Puppy Love....

I tend to name our pets based on what I like in real life.  Like, for example, my beloved miniature Chihuahua was named Gus, after my favorite character from my favorite movie “Lonesome Dove”.  Then there was the beautiful gray kitten we had last summer who I named “Lee Greenwood”… for obvious reasons.

We had our first litter of bloodhound puppies last week.  There are six males and one female.  I was thinking that we should give the female a really special name since she’s outnumbered.  So, I decided to name her something very important to me.  Something that pops in my mind first thing every morning.  Something I could not live without. 

Her name is “Fancy Cake”.   #fatamyprobz